BEAT IT!
Hey Astros: keep this $@&! as far away from your team as possible!
Nov 10, 2022, 11:21 am
Fans showed up to see the Astros, not them. Photo by Jamie Squire/Getty Images.
Dear Astros owner Jim Crane and everybody who’s minding the store at Houston City Hall.
Next time the Astros win the World Series, which should be next year and several years after that, let’s not invite politicians to ride down Smith Street in the team’s victory celebration.
Let’s say there were 2 million people downtown for the Astros parade. Hey, I’ll go with 2 million when it helps my point. You know how many went to the parade to watch Lt. Governor Dan Patrick flash his toothy grin from a float?
In the words of George Costanza … absolute zero!
Patrick has been accused of being tone-deaf, but even he had to hear people boo him like he was a back-and-white movie villain tying the town’s pretty librarian to the railroad tracks.
Same for Harris County Judge Lina Hidalgo and every politician glomming off the Astros’ popularity and success. Nobody cares about you sidling up to the Astros.
Then there was Sen. Ted Cruz, smiling like he was Santa Claus at the end of the Thanksgiving Day Parade. Except people usually don’t boo, shoot the finger and hurl a full can of White Claw at St. Nick.
I watched all this and thought, don’t these politicians have a shred of self-awareness, an ounce of dignity?
We vote for you, well, at polling places that remember to stock up on ballots, to fill our potholes and fix downtown street lights when they’re flashing red in all directions, and you can’t even do that right. We do not want you riding in the Astros parade and thinking it’s all right to steal the limelight from our World Series champions.
We love the Astros. We tolerate you, and just barely. Next time a Houston team wins a title, maybe UH in this season’s Final Four, you should stay home or fly to Cancun.
I heard more jeering for Cruz at the parade than when the Iron Sheik spit on the American flag at WrestleMania.
When Hidalgo began tweeting congratulations to the Astros during their playoff run, the comments were not exactly supportive: “First game all year, huh?” “Jumping on the bandwagon?” “Aren’t you embarrassed?”
The parade crowd’s vitriol hit 11 when Cruz came into sight. The reaction to Cruz weeks ago in Yankee Stadium was brutal: “Racist!” “You piece of garbage!” “Go home you a—hole.” But that was tame to what Houston fans threw at him - in addition to that can.
Cruz has become a heel wrestler. The more people yell insults at him, the more he seems to enjoy it. Strange.
I heard someone say, “They need to lay off Ted. He’s got his daughters here with him.” Think maybe he was using his kids as props to keep the natives restful?
Wouldn’t have been the first time he used his daughters to take his heat.
Here’s some advice for Cruz and every politician who gravy-trains off popular sports teams.
Read the room.
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Despite a last-minute comeback attempt by Gonzaga on Saturday, the Cougars defeated the Bulldogs and advanced to the Sweet 16 for the sixth straight NCAA Tournament.
Houston will face the No.4 seed Purdue, who made it to the championship game last year.
The Boilermakers will be one of the toughest opponents the Cougars have faced thus far and will essentially have the home-court advantage with the game taking place in Indianapolis.
Despite the daunting matchup on paper, Houston is currently an -8.5 favorite to win this game. The Cougars should be able to handle Purdue so long as their offense stays hot and they continue to play defense at an elite level.
Keep the offense flowing
Houston guard LJ Cryer matched a career-high with 30 points against Gonzaga and has been the offensive focal point of this team.
This season, the Baylor transfer has averaged 15.6 points per game and has stepped up to be one of the unquestioned leaders of this team.
In addition to Cryer, the Cougars have Milos Uzan and Emanuel Sharp, who can carry the offensive load as they did during the Big 12 Tournament and against SIUE on Thursday.
J’Wan Roberts is another key factor for Houston’s success. The senior forward seems to have recovered from his ankle injury and has been a productive player since returning to the lineup.
Roberts leads the team in rebounds and is one of the most efficient scorers for the Cougars, averaging more than 50% from the field over his last five seasons.
Houston’s dynamic offense and elite defense makes this team one of the toughest to beat during the tournament.
Containing Purdue’s stars
The Boilermakers have two proficient scorers on their team, Trey Kaufman-Renn and Braden Smith, who each average over 15 points per game.
Kaufman-Renn scored 22 points in his previous game against McNeese State and has been one of Purdue’s best players for most of this year.
Roberts and Joseph Tuggler will likely be assigned to the junior forward to slow down his offense, forcing his teammates to step up.
Smith is Purdue’s second-leading scorer, averaging 16 points per game, and has the most assists and steals for the Boilermakers this season.
Both Uzan and Cyrer, who have been elite parameter defenders, will cover the Purdue guard and limit his production.
Containing both Kaufman-Renn and Smith will be Houston’s top priority and the key to come away victorious.
Play Cougar basketball
Head coach Kelvin Sampson has now made it to at least the Sweet 16 six consecutive times and has his team well-positioned to make another deep tournament run.
Since arriving in Houston, the 69-year-old coach has turned this program from an afterthought to one of the best basketball teams in the country year after year.
Sampson’s key to his success is instilling a defensive-first mentality into his team and getting the best effort out of his players.
This season is no different, as Houston has the number-one ranked defense in the nation and is holding their opponents to 58.4 points per game on average.
If the Cougars can create consistent offense and continue playing defense at an elite level, they should win this game with ease and advance to the Elite 8 for the first time in three years.
The Houston-Purdue game will be played at Lucas Oil Stadium on Friday at 9 pm. The winner will play either Kentucky or Tennessee in the next round.