WATSON!!!

Here’s how Texans ownership put their fans in the worst possible position

Here’s how Texans ownership put their fans in the worst possible position
No wonder Watson reportedly wants to play for the Jets. Composite image by Jack Brame.

Here's the real tragedy of Houston Texans superstar quarterback Deshaun Watson "requesting" (translation: "demanding") a trade, reportedly to the New York Jets. If Watson had done this a year ago, maybe Larry David's golf buddy Carl Sachs would still be alive.

Sure Watson is trying to get the last laugh on Texans owner Cal McNair now, but he already got the first laugh last year on an episode of David's hit comedy Curb Your Enthusiasm on HBO.

If you watched the "The Ugly Section" episode of Curb, you know that Carl was an obsessed Jets fan - to the point where he was so upset over the Jets' constant losing that he killed himself. His suicide note said, simply, "I can't take any more disappointment."

Here's the best scene:

*NSFW LANGUAGE

When told that Carl took his own life, Larry said, "That's what he used to say when we watched the Jets games together. I've seen that guy sob after losses. During games I've seen him sob. And they just kept losing and it kept eating at him. The Jets killed Carl … and a little bit the Knicks."

Larry tried to console Carl's widow at the funeral. Well, console and ask her for a date. That's confidence, hitting on a widow at her husband's funeral.

Carl's widow Veronica asked Larry, "I'm so thrown by this. Did he seem different to you? Was he agitated about anything?"

Larry: "Yes, he was very upset about the Jets."

Veronica: "Those f'ing Jets. He loved them so much and all they did was disappoint. The Jets ruined my marriage. One night he just woke up and yelled 'Watson!' What is that? Was it a Sherlock Holmes reference or something?"

Larry: "No, I think that is a reference to Deshaun Watson, who the Jets passed on drafting in 2017."

No wonder Watson reportedly wants to play for the Jets. That's pretty heady stuff, being mentioned on the funniest TV show ever. And think of all the suicidal Jets fans he can save in New York.

Plus, he'll be leaving the most dysfunctional team in professional sports. In one year, the Texans have fired an incompetent coach and general manager, traded their best receiver DeAndre Hopkins for a broken-down running back, infuriated Andre Johnson the only member of the Texans "Ring of Honor," elevated Jack Easterby a despised Svengali figure with no experience running a football team to general manager, exposed its president has an inarticulate hayseed with zero people skills who hired a new head coach who's been in the league for nearly three decades and hasn't even held a coordinator job, and most important, created such a toxic atmosphere that the most celebrated player in Texans history J.J. Watt, and their supremely gifted quarterback Deshaun Watson, want to leave.

More and more, the Watson dilemma boils down to a simple ultimatum to owner Cal McNair: either Jack Easterby goes or Watson goes. One or the other. What's it going to be, him or me? And Jethro apparently is picking "him" - Easterby.

It's such a Shakespearean tragedy that fans are supporting Watt and Watson's desire to get out of town. They know the Texans with McNair/Easterby calling the shots are hopeless. When was the last time you heard of local fans cheering on players who hate playing for the hometown team? Watson, who is obsessed with winning, is so disgusted with the Texans' organization that he reportedly wants to be traded to a team with an even worse won-loss record than the Texans. This is not going to end well for anybody.

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Cristian Javier is in better shape this season. Photo by Carmen Mandato/Getty Images.

As the Astros prepare to play their first game of spring training against the Nationals this Saturday, we're starting to see reports about how the players approached the offseason, and what tweaks they made to improve in the 2024 season.

Cristian Javier is a player Astros fans are hoping bounces back this year, as his ERA jumped from 2.54 in 2022 to 4.56 in 2023. Workload was thought to be one of the main factors causing his regression, he dealt with a dead arm last season and threw more innings than ever before (162).

Another explanation could be the pitch clock. This was another new element all pitchers had to deal with last year, and that also likely played a role in his struggles.

But according to The Athletic's Chandler Rome, Javier believes he was carrying some extra weight last season. Add that to some mechanical issues he was experiencing, and his struggles in 2023 make a lot more sense. And to be fair, he wouldn't be the first person to get a little fat and happy after winning a World Series.

In an effort to get back on track in 2024, Javier said he lost around 15 pounds this offseason. With the pitch clock not going anywhere, pitchers need to be in better cardiac shape than ever before.

Hopefully this modification helps Javier return to form and put up jaw-dropping numbers like he did in 2022. This rotation needs Javier to be the dominate pitcher we all know he's capable of being. With Justin Verlander behind schedule and Framber Valdez trying to bounce back from his own down year, Houston will depend on Javier like never before.

The Astros are certainly counting on it after giving him a 5-year, $64 million contract last season. Javier will definitely be a player to watch this spring.

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