Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images
Texans' head coach and general manager Bill O'Brien's time in Houston has been mediocre at best. He's 52-44 (.542) in the regular season and 2-4 (.333) in the postseason. The fourth postseason loss came in the debacle in Kansas City this past postseason. I t was then when the national media finally became fully aware of his ineptitude as a coach. The past two offseasons, including this one, have seen O'Brien the GM make some of the worst trades. He overpaid for acquiring Laremy Tunsil and Kenny Stills, while also getting back minimal value for Jadeveon Clowney and DeAndre Hopkins.
Bottom line: O'Brien has to go. It seems as if the McNairs are pleased with his performance given that they extended him and gave him so much power despite him not producing tangible results deserving of the extension, raise, and added power. Fans have had enough and seem prepared to hit the team where it hurts most: their wallet. Who would want this job? Who's qualified to take over such a mess and make it into something good? Well, I'd like to throw my name into the hat. Here's why I think I'm qualified to right the ship on Kirby:
I'm a football nerd
I understand I've never played the game on any organized level. However, there are people in charge of major corporations who have inherited their positions. There's also a history of coaches and front office officials who have had similar paths. I've studied the game more intimately than those who get paid for their knowledge on the game. I've been told by former players that I know more than some who've actually played it. My favorite compliment came recently when a person told me I hooked them with the way I described gap responsibilities and made it plain enough to understand while also being passionate.
I'm not an arrogant jerk
In this line of work, we offer our opinions. Sometimes we're right. Sometimes we're wrong. There's never been a time in which I was wrong and refused to admit it and eat my words. Often times, I'll preface a statement saying "I hope I'm wrong about this, but..." because I'd rather be wrong about it for the sake of the fans that read or listen to me. I won't disparage my players in public or private without good reason. I won't alienate the media and will be sure to give them proper answers to their questions. I also won't create a toxic environment around the organization in which players tell other players not to come here, media members get their credentials threatened, and other organizations routinely take advantage of us when it comes to trades due to my personal feelings and general stupidity.
My Madden game is pretty good
I know what you're thinking, but hear me out. O'Brien's situational football knowledge is terrible. I've been known to play Madden in a manner in which keeps me in games because I make the right decisions and call the right plays in just about every and any situation. I'm good enough at Madden to have won trophies playing it. I've beaten some of thew highest ranked users in online play before. Using my football nerd-level knowledge of the game, I've been able to figure out how to win more often than I lose. With the way the game is being played nowadays, some infusion of video game knowledge could help take advantage of the current rules. Deshaun Watson has a unique set of skills that I don't feel Bill O'Brien is fully capable of taking advantage of. I believe I can and Madden would help with some of that. It would also help with situational football.
I know what I don't know
The greatest leaders are very smart. They have a level of knowledge and expertise in their field that allows them to attain power. The best of them know what they don't know and surround themselves with some of the best people who do. For example: I know I'm more knowledgable about the defensive side of the ball, so I'd hire some of the best/most creative offensive minds to run that side of the ball. I'd also hire some of the same type of minds on the defensive side to assist me where my knowledge may lack. This way I'm not overly arrogant and relying on my own abilities. It also ensures I'm doing the best I can to make my team as successful as can be. Hiring a general manager whom I respect is a part of this as well. As evidenced by the bumbling trades made on his watch, O'Brien the GM is awful. I know I've said in the past that his role as GM was growing on me, but that growth has turned into a flesh-eating bacteria. Hiring the right people, giving them control to do their jobs, and having faith in them is essential. Having a situational decision-making sheet along with a play-calling sheet is another essential I'd introduce.
To the fans out there: I promise to make you proud. You won't feel the need to sell your tickets, burn your gear, and become fans of other teams. To the media: I vow to answer your questions with respect and to the best of my ability knowing you have a job to do. To ownership: I know this is a business and you're about the bottom line, but winning makes you more money and that's what I'm here for. To the rest of the league: you're on notice because this team will no longer be a joke. So if the McNair family is listening, I'd like my shot. At least give me the chance to earn your trust enough to be a special adviser so I can advise you to get rid of old booty chin because he's taken this franchise down a blck hole of despair. It's time for a change and I'm the agent of change you need!
Sunday night matchups don't get much exciting than this, as the Houston Texans host the Detroit Lions in prime-time at NRG.
The Lions come into this game on a six-game winning streak looking every bit of the best team in football. Houston on the other hand has lost two of their last three games with a struggling offense unable to protect their quarterback.
CJ Stroud has only one passing touchdown over this span, and is clearly having trouble adjusting to life without Stefon Diggs and Nico Collins.
If Houston is going to come away with an upset victory, they will need big performances from Tank Dell and Joe Mixon. After catching 4 passes against the Colts two weeks ago, Mixon not only failed to catch a single pass against the Jets, but he wasn't even targeted.
Considering the Texans' offensive line issues, choosing not to use Mixon as a pass catcher is hard to fathom. Especially since he and Dell are the team's top 2 playmakers.
What's working in the Texans' favor?
They play this game at home, where they are undefeated this season. A lot of the team's protection issues have popped up on the road, so communication should be easier for the offense on their home turf.
Bulls on Parade
We have good news and bad news about the defense this week. On the positive side, Azeez Al-Shaair and Jimmy Ward have returned to practice. If they're able to contribute on Sunday night, that would give the defense a lift.
And now for the bad news. Will Anderson has yet to practice this week after rolling his ankle in the Jets game. If he is unable to practice on Friday, it's hard to imagine he'll be active against Detroit.
X-factors
The Texans have to show some improvement on the offensive line this week.
Houston must lean on Joe Mixon again, as Nico Collins isn't expected to play.
Lions' Amon-Ra St. Brown is one of the best receivers in the league, and he does most of his damage from the slot. If the Texans continue to deploy Jalen Pitre against premier receivers in man coverage, St. Brown is going to light up the scoreboard.
What would a win over the Lions mean to Houston?
The Texans are no longer considered a true championship contender because of their losses to the Packers, Vikings, and Jets. In fact, the Bills are the only team with a winning record that the Texans have beaten.
An upset win over the streaking Lions would change that narrative.
What does Vegas think?
The Lions are currently favored by 3.5 and the total is set at 49 points.
Don't miss the full preview of Texans-Lions in the video above!
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