FUZZY GEOGRAPHY

Clueless media once again shows their ass about Texas sports

Photo by Ken Hoffman

CBS, the "Tiffany Network," spent hundreds of millions of dollars to broadcast this year's March Madness games.

And then they hired Timmy in the third grade to draw their graphics for the big event. And it looks like Timmy is getting an "F" in geography.

Recently, I was watching one of the first-round games — I forget which one, I was all day in front of the TV — when the announcers started talking about Texas having seven teams in the tournament. Seven teams ties the all-time record for most teams from one state with California in 2002, and Texas in 2010 and 2018.

The Texas qualifiers this year are: University of Texas, in Austin; University of Houston and Texas Southern University, in Houston; Baylor University, in Waco; Texas Tech University, in Lubbock; Abilene Christian University, in Abilene; and North Texas University, in Denton.

Under the banner of "Lone Star State Success – NCAA Tournament Teams from Texas This Season," CBS showed a map where all the colleges are located in Texas.

Whoa? Even in my basketball bleary state, that map ain't close.

Literally ain't close. CBS had Austin practically on the Texas-Oklahoma border, Baylor south of UT, and UH and Texas Southern some distance apart (they're practically next-door neighbors.)

Politicians are always proposing school redistricting, but this is crazy.

If there's one college, you don't want to misplace, it's the University of Texas. Fun fact: every year UT tops the Forbes list for selling the most "merch," and no other school comes close. Let Notre Dame, Alabama, Tennessee, and others fight it out for No. 2. Don't mess with Texas, as in UT, indeed.

I contacted CBS to ask what gives with that map — you guys have UT hundreds of miles north of Austin – but they didn't respond. (Maybe CBS was busy finding a geography tutor for Timmy.)

Twitter is like the goalie who wins the Vezina Trophy in the National Hockey League: nothing gets past Twitter. I freeze-framed CBS' map of Texas' seven colleges in March Madness and posted it.

Thousands of Twitter users responded. Many simply posted one word: Yikes! Doh! Sheesh! Embarrassing! Lazy!

But, being how this is Texas, where everybody's a comedian, Twitter let fly:

  • "The University of Texas at Plano."
  • "Never knew the Longhorns are now located in Arlington!"
  • "UT-McKinney."
  • "The best thing about the new map, the drive from Dallas to Austin is now only 23 minutes."
  • "I guess UT's weekend MBA extension site really kicked their athletic program into high gear this year."
  • "How did Houston wind up near Beaumont and Baylor is now located in Waxahachie?"
  • "As both a map guy and a Texas guy, this here really burns my bacon."
  • "Yep, that online learning is paying off. #Geographymatters."
  • "They threw some darts and hoped they weren't too far off."
  • "I've seen better attempts at pin the tail on the donkey."
  • "How do you get semi-close with Abilene Christian and North Texas, but miss the Texas state capital city?"
  • "Who did this map? Five to 10 minutes of research is all it would have taken."

Maybe the smartest comment, opening up old wounds that need to be opened: "I think they mean seven men's teams. Once again the women's teams are erased."

Jimmy and J.J.: a perfect concert match
Usually Jimmy Buffett is hitting the road this time of year, but if COVID is keeping him grounded, he'll bring some of his greatest hits concerts to fans online. Buffett is calling this his "Nothin' But Time Virtual Tour 2021," rewinding concerts from yesteryear on Saturday nights at 7pm. You can watch on Margaritaville.tv or listen on Radio Margaritaville on Sirius/XM.

To learn more about Jimmy's concert schedule and how JJ Watt ties into this, continue on CultureMap.

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The Rockets selected Jalen Green with the No. 2 pick. Photo by Arturo Holmes/Getty Images.

The city of Houston can finally rejoice as Jalen Green was selected as the number two pick by the Rockets at the 2021 NBA Draft. It was already suspected that the Rockets would draft Green from past reports. Shams Charania of The Athletic already reported that the Rockets narrowed their decision down to Green.

Green is an explosive shooting guard that can get in-and-out amongst the perimeter and paint. With the G-League Ignite, he averaged 17.9 points, 2.8 assists, and 1.5 steals per game. He is an excellent free throw shooter at 82.9 percent. Like James Harden, he is incredibly good at getting to the free throw line. Green has a good trigger from three by shooting 36.5 percent on 5.7 attempts a game. His mature status since high school has prepared him for the NBA.

"His down-hill playmaking is really hard to guard", as Joey Fucca, his ex-coach told TDS. "If he says he's going to get to the rim, good luck. He is very good at getting to the free throw line, he is also very explosive to finish above the rim. When his three ball is on, you're just going to have a long night. I wouldn't be excited to guard him."

Green has blistering speed with outstanding handles to blow by his defenders and score. Spectators have compared Green to a younger Kobe Bryant, Tracy McGrady, Bradley Beal, and Zach Lavine, which are superstar players. He is a particularly good midrange shooter underneath the perimeter, as he shot 35 percent on a small quantity of attempts in a shorter season.

"Jalen is a uniquely blessed guy. He's a transcendent athlete," as Rockets GM Rafael Stone said. "He can handle the ball, and he can shoot. Normally, people that athletic aren't as skilled. We think that combination of tools makes him an extraordinarily exciting prospect."

During his press conference on Thursday night, Green emphasized the achievements he wants to accomplish with the Rockets. Green even discussed his desire of being a better defender, as he wants to continue to get better. He has a great wingspan and lateral movement to stay with opposing players on defense and be disruptive in the passing lanes.

"They're going to say it's a great choice," Green said. "Rookie of the Year, All-Star, All-Defense, max contract. We're doing it big."

"Yeah, I think I can be that piece. I think I'm going to bring that dominant mentality, that defensive mindset…They already got a lot of star players"

As the draft continued, the Rockets sent future draft picks from the Wizards to land the 16th pick in the draft, which was 6'10 Alperen Sengun from Turkey. The 16th pick did belong to the Oklahoma City Thunder until Rafael Stone executed an interesting deal with Sam Presti.

"We did not think he would fall to us at 23, so we were really aggressive to try and move up all throughout the first round to acquire him," as Stone said.

Sengun's abilities on the court revolve around his post ups and skillful passing. He even maintains good feet along the baseline. In his press conference, he mentioned his passing skills can become better. There are clips of him looking impressive on shovel passes, passing the ball behind his back, and finding the cutting man towards the basket. Sengun looked good in double teams by showing he can still find the open man with his back turned.

While playing in the Turkish Super League, Sengun was an MVP at 18-years-old, averaged 19.2 points, 9.4 rebounds, 2.5 assist, 1.7 blocks, and 1.3 steals per game. He could be another huge figure next to Christian Wood on the court, and a safety blanket for the Rockets if they cannot bring back Kelly Olynyk.

Usman Garbua is similar to former Rocket Luc Mbah a Moute. He is 6'8 with a tremendous wingspan at 7'3 and can guard anyone on the court, which is 1-5. Garbua was seen guarding Kevin Durant in the Team USA vs. Spain matchup and had interesting battles. The Rockets will get a ton of energy out of the 19-year-old player. He knows how to run the floor in transition, so he can finish around the rim. As I see it, he could be on a defensive first team in the future as he matures more. Garbua will become a defensive nightmare against opposing players.

"I think he's the best defender in the world outside of the NBA, and he's just 19 years old," Stone said. "I think he potentially could be really, really impactful on that side of the ball."

As the Rockets made their last selection, they selected Green's AAU buddy, Josh Christopher from Arizona State. He impressed a ton of scouts during his draft workouts and scrimmage against other prospects. Christopher had a double-double during his third scrimmage, which was 16 points and 10 rebounds. He is a very shifty guard with a ferocious step back.

While playing with the Sun Devils, he averaged 14.3 points per game and shot 49 percent from the field. Just like Green, he loved the midrange opportunities, as he shot 49.6 percent underneath the perimeter. He is another shifty big body the Rockets will have in their back court at 6'5. Christopher is very good at rebounding and playing defense. Stone loves watching him in defensive one-on-one situations. Christopher has Sixth Man of the Year written all over him because of his stocky body type and upside.

Hopefully, the Rockets have an exciting summer league and training camp along with their season.

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