EVERY-THING SPORTS

Here's your all-encompassing glossary for the offseason and free agency

What's he trying to say? Composite image by Jack Brame

Good morning class! My name is Mr. Every and I'll be your teacher for today's class known as "Sports Terminology", or what some may refer to by its nickname "B.S. 101."

We're going through some interesting times right now. Every sports season has been upended to some degree because of COVID. The Astros are coming off a cheating scandal, making the ALCS, and almost making a World Series despite losing Gerrit Cole to free agency and Justin Verlander to injury. The Rockets are in all sorts of disarray! Nobody on the team seems to be happy and they all have requested trades. The Texans are Texan-ing their way into deeper irrelevancy in the most Texans way possible. Not to mention ALL THREE FRANCHISES have gotten rid of their head coach and general manager in one form or another!

Throughout this time, you'll hear a lot of words, phrases, terms and things that may be hard to decipher. Here's a glossary or some terms and phrases to help you figure out what's going on:

"(insert player name) isn't going anywhere": This phrase has multiple meanings. One is more literal and means said player is not, in fact, going anywhere and the organization wants him to stay. The more common meaning is that this is a holding statement until we find the best offer. We want the fans and media to calm down until we find the best offer.

"I didn't request a trade": This either means I didn't request a trade, or I requested one just not publicly.

"I plan to test free agency": I'm looking to secure the biggest bag I can! This could also mean I'm looking to win a ring. Rarely does this mean I'm looking for the best mashup of winning and making money.

"I'm opting out of my contract": Typically reserved for the NBA, this means a player is either A) re-signing a bigger, long term deal with his existing team or B) he's overvaluing himself and about to meet a sad reality.

"We're still committed to building a winner": We're looking to maximize our profit margins, even if that means we won't win. This is organization speak for we're about to start losing, but will be more profitable.

"I'm not happy with my current contract/role": Here's a doozy. Some players say this when they're actually outplayed their contract and/or are ready for a more prime time role. Totally get it in either instance. Then, there are the times in which you wish you could slap the taste out of the mouth that said this because they're completely delusional.

"I'm going to do what's best for me and my family": Again, I'm going to secure the biggest bag out there! On the rare occasion a player is taking his family's best interest into consideration, he's probably made his money and/or won rings, so he's looking to stabilize his family's home-base.

"I want to play for a contender": Guys who say this know what winning a ring would mean to their legacy. Even if their ring is discredited some by forming/joining a super team, they want to feel the validation of being a champion. This is coming from guys much earlier in their careers now, as opposed to older vets ring chasing.

There are other terms, words, and phrases you may hear. Those may or may not be on the test, but you're responsible for them as well. Now class, I want you to study these and prepare yourselves for the test next week. DO NOT! I repeat: DO NOT call one of the ESPN 97.5 shows sounding like an idiot after reading this! Conduct yourselves with some decency and intelligence dammit! I will immediately give you an F without grading your test! See y'all next week!

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Yuli Gurriel had a monster night at the plate Friday. Photo by Elsa/Getty Images.

Although they lost the series 2-1, the Astros ended their road trip with a nice win over the Yankees to head home on a positive note. On Friday, they welcomed in the Toronto Blue Jays and former teammate George Springer, currently on the IL, to start a three-game series and long homestand. They had an excellent night at the plate, along with a strong start from Jose Urquidy, cruising past the Blue Jays to take the opener.

Final Score: Astros 10, Blue Jays 4

Astros' Record: 17-15, third in the AL West

Winning Pitcher: Jose Urquidy (3-2)

Losing Pitcher: Ross Stripling (0-2)

Jays strike first, then Houston responds and never looks back

It first appeared that Urquidy may be in for a long night, giving up two solo home runs early in Friday's game, one to Bo Bichette in the top of the first with one out to put Toronto up 1-0, then another to Danny Jansen in the top of the third. However, Urquidy would lock-in, and his offense would back him up strongly.

Houston ended up sending nine batters to the plate in the bottom of the second, getting two runs on a homer by Carlos Correa, then later loading the bases to set up an RBI walk by Alex Bregman. In the bottom of the fifth, with a one-run lead at 3-2, Yuli Gurriel expanded the lead to three runs on a two-run shot.

Gurriel went on to have a fantastic night, going 4-for-4 at the plate with 4 RBI. His third of those came in the bottom of the seventh, extending the lead again with an RBI single to make it 6-2. Kyle Tucker made it a five-run game that same inning with an RBI double, then more insurance came in the bottom of the eighth. They reached double-digits that inning, with Alex Bregman, Yordan Alvarez, and Yuli Gurriel, his fourth of the night, all getting an RBI to make it 10-2.

Urquidy finishes seven, then Emanuel finishes it off

Those gave Urquidy plenty of support, though he would bounce back after the two early homers and have a nice night on the mound. He allowed just two other hits, working around both, en route to a seven-inning two-run performance to earn him the win. His final line: 7.0 IP, 4 H, 2 ER, 1 BB, 2 K, 2 HR, 84 P.

He likely could have gone longer, but Dusty Baker turned the ball over to Kent Emanuel to wrap things up with the significant lead. He did so, despite allowing a two-run home run to former-Astro Teoscor Hernandez in the top of the ninth to make the score 10-4. The win kept the Astros above .500 and two games back of the A's, who sit atop the AL West standings.

Up Next: The middle game of this series will be a 6:10 PM start Saturday night. The pitching matchup will be Steven Matz (4-2, 4.78 ERA) for Toronto and the electric Cristian Javier (3-0, 1.75 ERA) for Houston.

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