FALCON POINTS
Hey sports world: It's time to retire the "Houston, you/we have a problem" cliche
Oct 16, 2019, 6:54 am
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Sports might be the worst when it comes to cliches. Fans and broadcasters alike can't help themselves.
Defense wins championships.
It doesn't get any better than this.
The best defense is a good offense.
One game at a time.
No I in team.
It is what it is.
Then there is my personal favorite, "you guys have a face for radio. When was the last time you heard that?"
Um, yesterday, and 11 other times this week. But yes, you are very creative!
These and many more are all lame. They are lazy. They are dumb.
And then there is the worst one of all:
Houston, we have a problem.
Or, the derivative, Houston, you have a problem.
Memo to fans in other cities: It is time to retire this phrase. Memo to announcers (including the Fox announcer who used it Sunday night) and worse yet, headline writers: You are pathetic and about as creative as a rock.
And if you are from Houston and have used it, delete your Twitter account immediately and pray for forgiveness. You are what we affectionately call a "dumb."
How stale is it? The phrase comes from an Apollo mission (that's space flight, which our country once did) message in the 1960s. That's SIXTIES. It was clever 50 years ago. Yet a quick Twitter search for the phrase yielded thousands of results. A google search? How about 281 MILLION results. So if you use it, you aren't even one in a million. You are one in 281 million. But that makes you clever and creative, right? If we are going to use phrases from the 1960s, how about "make love not war?" Or better yet, "we all live in a yellow submarine?"
Rest assured, there will be fan signs in Indianapolis this week, as there always are. Yankees fans will do it, too. (Although because it's New York, the signs will likely be misspelled. Or it will be "youse" have a problem).
First off, if you make signs for sporting events and are over the age of 12, you have your own issues. But do people really sit around and think, "hey, you know what would be clever?"
The real shame? Houston sports teams have no shortage of targets for clever phrases. You could write a book on Bill O'Brien alone. James Harden is just begging to be made fun of by anyone. Even the Astros have plenty of players to go after.
Houston fans collectively groan every time they hear the phrase. And they hear or see it A LOT. Public service announcement: It makes you look silly, boring and yes, dumb.
So if you are thinking about tweeting it, stop yourself. If you are diligently working on a sign, stop it. YOU are the problem.
And if you are an announcer? Go back to calling junior high school games.
It's also incumbent on the rest of us to stop this menace in our lifetime. If you see something, say something. Send them a shame bell. Or better yet, a link to this story.
Then again, it is what it is.
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The Houston Astros kick off a pivotal weekend series against the Boston Red Sox on Friday night at Fenway Park — and they'll do so with a familiar face back in the lineup. Carlos Correa, reacquired in a stunning trade deadline move on Thursday, is set to make his return to the Astros and will hit cleanup in his first game back with the team that drafted him No. 1 overall in 2012.
Correa rejoins a Houston club that sits atop the AL West at 62-47 and is coming off a resounding 9-1 win over Washington on Wednesday, fueled by Jose Altuve’s four-hit performance. The Astros are 27-23 on the road and enter Friday with the fourth-best on-base percentage in the American League (.321).
The Red Sox, meanwhile, have won six of their last 10 games and hold a 34-21 record at home. Boston enters the weekend third in the competitive AL East at 59-51. Outfielder Jarren Duran has been a spark plug, hitting .265 with 29 doubles and 12 triples on the year.
Houston will send right-hander Hunter Brown (9-5) to the mound, while Boston will counter with RHP Cooper Criswell (1-0).
Friday marks the first meeting of the season between these two clubs.
All eyes will be on Correa’s return in a stadium where he’s delivered countless postseason moments. Now, he begins the next chapter of his Astros career, joining a team counting on him to help fuel their playoff push.
Starting lineup
So how will Joe Espada deploy his new toys? Pena is back at shortstop and leading off, with Altuve hitting second and serving as the DH. Jesus Sanchez gets his first Astros, start hitting third, and playing left field. Correa begins his Astros reunion hitting fourth and playing third base.
Big night in Beantown.
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— Houston Astros (@astros) August 1, 2025
Yainer Diaz (C) will hit fifth, followed by Christian Walker (1B), and Taylor Trammell (CF). It's interesting to see Cam Smith hitting so far down the lineup at eighth. He'll play right field and finally, Mauricio Dubon will hit ninth and play second base.
Betting odds
BETMGM SPORTSBOOK LINE: Astros -134, Red Sox +113; over/under is 8 runs
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