NOT AGAIN!

How to avoid making another historical Houston Astros gaffe

How to avoid making another historical Houston Astros gaffe
It ain't over till it's over. Composite Getty Image.

With a nod to Mark Twain, reports of the Houston Astros’ demise in the ALCS were greatly exaggerated. The defending World Series champs beat the Texas Rangers, 8-5, Wednesday night on the road, of course, in Arlington. The ALCS stands at 2-1 in favor of the Rangers, with the next two games in Arlington.

Rangers’ fans and media were quick to shovel dirt on the Astros grave after the Rangers swept the first two games of the series in Houston.

Consider this headline in Tuesday’s Fort Worth Star-Telegram, which is a real newspaper in a major market. In fact, it’s the 45th largest newspaper in the U.S.

“Houston Astros dynasty looks to be fading fast versus Texas”

The story contained the following bon mots:

“These Astros look demoralized.”

“The Lone Star Showdown is thus far playing more like the Whataburger Beatdown.”

“The Houston Astros won’t do it but when the history of their dynastic run is written, or turned into a Netflix documentary, there will be a “the end started here” moment.”

And to show how razor sharp the Star-Telegram’s analysis of the ALCS is, how’s this from the Game 2 wrapup?

“The fans at Enron Field were starving for any reason to get into this series.”

The Astros ballpark hasn’t been called Enron Field for more than two decades. Two days later, the online version of Star-Telegram still says Enron Field. Hello? The Astros play at Minute Maid Park. You coulda/shoulda looked it up. Dumbass newspaper.

Of course history still favors the Rangers. The team leading 2-1 in an LCS goes on the win the series 70 percent of the time. No team that lost the first two games of an LCS at home has ever rebounded to win the series. That’s true, but three times it’s happened in the World Series. And the Astros have a World Series mentality. Speaking of the World Series, the Texas Rangers have never won one. Fun fact.

My 5-cents is on the Astros. Resurrected pitcher Jose Urquidy throws Thursday night against the Rangers’ Andrew Heaney. If the Astros win and tie the series, the Rangers’ backsides will be puckered tighter than a balloon knot at a Chuck E. Cheese birthday party.

After Wednesday night’s win, the Astros are 7-1 at Globe Life Field this year. And yes, that’s the correct name of the Rangers’ stadium. See? It’s not hard to know where these games are being played.

Now a confession. In 2005, my newspaper, the Houston Chronicle, buried the Astros more embarrassingly than the Fort Worth Star-Telegraph this week.

On May 30th, the Astros were trounced 9-0 and their record fell to 18-32, good for last place in the National League Central. Remember the National League?

Two days later, the front page of the Chronicle sports page ran a huge drawing of a gravestone pronouncing the Astros dead for the 2005 season. The stone was engraved: “RIP ASTROS SEASON.” The headline read, “The cold hard truth … the Astros might as well start thinking about next year.”

Much to the Chronicle’s red faces, the Astros turned their season around, finishing 89-73 and qualifying for the playoffs. They won the Wild Card game over the Phillies, won the NLDS over the Braves, won the NLCS over the Cardinals and advanced to their first World Series in franchise history.

If ever there was proof of life after death, it’s the Houston Chronicle sports page from June 1, 2005.

Lesson learned: do not write off the Astros. Then or now.

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The Vikings host the Texans this Sunday. Photo by Alex Slitz/Getty Images.

Though they have plenty of work to do, the Houston Texans are feeling good about their 2-0 start after dropping their first two games last season.

The Texans scored just three points after halftime Sunday night, but a smothering defensive performance allowed them to hold on for a 19-13 win over the Bears. The victory has them in early control in the AFC South after the Colts, Titans and Jaguars have all opened the season 0-2.

It’s the first time since 2016 that Houston has won its first two games.

“I definitely know that Texans football was not what we put on the field (Sunday), at least in the second half,” quarterback C.J. Stroud said. “We’ll definitely be better, for sure."

Stroud threw for 260 yards and a touchdown, but the Texans punted on five of their seven possessions in the second half and fumbled on another drive. Their only points after halftime came on a field goal early in the fourth quarter.

“Second half we were just flat,” Stroud said. “Just needed a big play or just needed (to) stack plays really. We just couldn’t find our rhythm.”

One thing that slowed the Texans on Sunday was their inability to run the ball effectively. Houston managed just 75 yards rushing against the Bears after leading the NFL with 213 yards in Week 1.

“They had a lot of penetration,” coach DeMeco Ryans said. “We weren’t able to have the lanes that we had the previous weeks. Something we have to clean up on the offensive side and make sure we just continue to get a head on the hat no matter what they show us.”

The running game was slowed because of an ankle injury to Joe Mixon, who had 159 yards rushing in the opener. He was injured early in the third quarter and returned near the end of the period, but had just two carries for 5 yards the rest of the game as he dealt with the injury. He finished with nine carries for 25 yards.

Ryans said that Mixon got “rolled up” and that it’s too early to know if he’ll play next week.

What’s working

The Texans were relentless in their pressure on rookie quarterback Caleb Williams Sunday night. Houston pressured Williams, the top overall pick in the draft, on 36 of his 37 pass attempts, according to NextGenStats.

Defensive ends Will Anderson Jr. and Danielle Hunter combined for 17 pressures and the Texans piled up seven sacks, which is tied for the second most in franchise history.

Houston had six different players with a sack Sunday night and the team’s nine sacks through two games ranks second in the NFL behind Minnesota’s 11 entering Monday.

What needs help

The Texans must get their running game back on track next week, which will be a tough task if Mixon can’t play. They could be without their top two running backs Sunday with Dameon Pierce dealing with a hamstring injury that kept him out of the game against Chicago.

Stock up

K Ka′imi Fairbairn has been great this season, with Ryans crediting him for Sunday night’s win. He was 4-for-4 against the Bears, making kicks of 59, 56, 53 and 47 yards. He also made three field goals of 50-plus yards in Week 1 to become the first kicker in NFL history to make five or more field goals of 50 yards or longer in a two-game span.

His 59-yard field goal on Sunday night was the second-longest in franchise history behind a 61-yard kick he made in 2021.

“He’s been consistent,” Ryans said. “He’s on it. He’s the reason why we’re standing here. We talk a lot about offense and defense (but) the kicking game is the reason why we won this game.”

Stock down

RB Cam Akers. Pushed into action because of injuries, Akers fumbled on the Chicago 4 with about 6½ minutes left Sunday. The Bears recovered the ball and it led to a field goal that got them within a score with less than three minutes left.

Injuries

Mixon and Pierce are the main injuries the team is dealing with this week.

Key number

252 — Entering Monday, wide receiver Nico Collins leads the NFL with 252 yards receiving, which is the second most in franchise history in the first two games of a season. Collins, who had a career-high 1,297 yards receiving last season, had 135 yards receiving and a touchdown Sunday night for the seventh 100-yard game of his career.

Next steps

Stroud and Houston’s offense will look to clean up their play and move the ball more effectively when they face an early test in a visit to the Minnesota Vikings, who are also 2-0, on Sunday.

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