THE COUCH SLOUCH

If you bet on Roger Goodell completely changing his stance on gambling, cash your ticket

Las Vegas betting
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Money never sleeps, correct? Well, the sun never sets on the sports-betting empire either. What, there are no games right now? Recently, Bovada started allowing action junkies to place bets on the weather – that's right, over/under wagers on the high temperature of, say, Philadelphia.***

Gambling never sleeps.

Which immediately brings us to Roger Goodell, the man who pimps for the National Football League at $40 million-plus per annum and a man who probably sleeps in his Armani suit to remind himself that there is moolah to be made every day and twice on Sundays.

While America snoozed during the early days of the coronavirus crisis in mid-March, NFL players approved the new collective bargaining agreement with league owners through 2030. And in that CBA, the NFL – that beacon of morality fighting against the point spread since the days before Pete Rozelle turned 21 – reached an accord with its players to share gambling revenue.

Before we get back to that betting blockbuster, let's briefly review the current NFL commissioner's public-stance history vis-à-vis gambling.

Ooh, this is going to be fun!

In 2003, Goodell and the NFL would not allow the Las Vegas Convention and Visitors Bureau to run a 30-second commercial promoting the city's tourism during the Super Bowl.

In 2009, Goodell wrote a letter to then-Delaware Gov. Jack Markell in protest of his state's effort to renew its NFL betting lottery, saying, "By legalizing sports betting it will be in Delaware's interest to create ever larger numbers of new gamblers as the state attempts to maximize any revenue found in this promotion. The negative social impact of additional gambling cannot be minimized in a community."

In 2012, as the NFL challenged efforts by New Jersey to legalize sports gambling, Goodell said, "It's a very strongly held view in the NFL, it has been for decades, that the threat that gambling could occur in the NFL or fixing of games or that any outcome could be influenced by the outside could be very damaging to the NFL and very difficult to ever recover from."

In 2017, after league owners voted approval of the Raiders' move from Oakland to Las Vegas, Goodell said, "Society in general has a little bit of a change with respect to gambling in general. We've seen that. I think we still strongly oppose legalized sports gambling. The integrity of our game is No. 1. We will not compromise on that."

And now, in 2020, Goodell, on a visit to Las Vegas, said, "We think that sports gambling in many ways creates a lot more engagement for our fans. It gives them another opportunity to engage with the game."

Oh my goodness, oh my goodness, Roger Goodell is a BORN-AGAIN GAMBLER!

How did this happen? Well, a Supreme Court ruling nearly two years ago opened the door for states to allow sports betting and the Raiders begin play in Las Vegas this fall, so, suddenly, the NFL stance is: Let's roll the dice and join the party!!!

Which brings us back to the new CBA. David Purdum of espn.com reported last week that the agreement refers to revenue from "gambling on any aspect of NFL games, any performance of NFL players in NFL games or in any other NFL/Club-related activity." Owners and players will share revenues, the CBA states, generated "by the operation of gambling-related businesses located in or physically attached to an NFL Stadium."

It even mentions potential profits from slot machines "located in or physically attached to an NFL Stadium."

I'll let you all absorb that for a moment or two.

After generations of stonewalling and bad-mouthing sports betting, the NFL now embraces gambling as long as the league gets its cut. Seventeen states, including seven that are home to NFL teams, already operate legal sports books.

Sooner or later, fans will be placing bets on NFL games while in NFL stadiums.

P.S. The NFL reportedly also is looking to hire a "vice president of sports betting."

I am available, but I do not work weekends.

(*** Pro tip: It's always going to be hotter than you think in Philly in the summer and colder than you think in the winter.)

Ask The Slouch

Q.With strip clubs closed, strippers in Portland, Ore., are making food deliveries topless. Did you think nothing positive could come out of this pandemic? (Jim O'Brien; Racine, Wis.)

A. You have inspired me – I am writing next week's column bottomless.

Q.If I told you that President Trump reached out to Alex Rodriguez last week for coronavirus advice, what would you say? (Julian Kaplan; Chicago)

A. I did not realize that human growth hormone was a possible vaccine for covid-19.

Q. So everyone now is sitting around watching TV all day. Why are you getting paid for it? (Mark Cohen; Gibsonia, Pa.)

A. You have uncovered my adult-lifelong professional scam to financial independence.

Q. Since this was supposed to be the start of the baseball season, are the Orioles already mathematically out of it? (Mike Kupiec; Green Island, N.Y.)

A. Pay the man, Shirley.

You, too, can enter the $1.25 Ask The Slouch Cash Giveaway. Just email asktheslouch@aol.com and, if your question is used, you win $1.25 in cash!



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Astros lose to Braves, 6-2. Composite Getty Image.

Reynaldo López struck out seven over six scoreless innings, Orlando Arcia homered and the Atlanta Braves won their third straight, 6-2 over the Houston Astros on Tuesday night.

López (2-0) allowed four hits and walked one in his third straight sterling outing to start the season.

“It’s like I’ve always said, for me, the important thing is to focus,” López said through an interpreter. “To have the focus during the outings and then, to be able to locate those pitches.”

He has given up one run in 18 innings for an ERA of 0.50.

“He threw the ball really well against a really good hitting club,” Atlanta manager Brian Snitker said. “Another solid one.”

Arcia hit a solo home run to left in the second and a sacrifice fly in the seventh.

Luis Guillorme and backup catcher Chadwick Tromp each hit a two-run double in the ninth to put the Braves ahead 6-0.

“Tromp has done a good job ever since we’ve been bringing him in these situations and filling in,” Snitker said. “I’ve got all the confidence in the world in him back there. ... He’s an aggressive hitter. He’s knocked in some big runs for us in the limited time that he’s played.”

Kyle Tucker homered for the Astros leading off the ninth against Aaron Bummer, and Mauricio Dubón had a two-out RBI single to cut the lead to four. After Bummer walked Chas McCormick to put two on, Raisel Iglesias induced a groundout by Victor Caratini to end it and secure his fourth save.

“They pitched well, and our guys are grinding out at-bats,” Houston manager Joe Espada said. “Even in the ninth inning there, we’re grinding, fighting until the end.”

Hunter Brown (0-3) yielded two runs on five hits with three strikeouts and three walks in six innings. Brown allowed nine runs in two-thirds of an inning in his previous start, last Thursday against Kansas City.

Brown said he executed better Tuesday than he had in his previous two starts.

“He mixed all his pitches well,” Espada said. “The breaking ball was effective. He threw some cutters in on the hands to some of those lefties. He mixed his pitches really well. That was a really strong performance.”

TRAINER’S ROOM

Braves: 2B Ozzie Albies was placed on the 10-day injured list with a broken right big toe. IF David Fletcher had his contract selected from Triple-A Gwinnett to take Albies’ place on the roster.

Astros: RHP Justin Verlander (right shoulder inflammation) threw a side session Tuesday, but Houston will wait until Wednesday to see how Verlander feels before deciding whether he will make his first start this weekend against the Nationals, Espada said. ... RHP Luis Garcia (right elbow surgery) threw around 20-25 pitches off the bullpen mound, and RHP José Urquidy (right forearm strain) also threw off the mound, Espada said. ... LHP Framber Valdez (left elbow soreness) played catch off flat ground.

UP NEXT

Atlanta LHP Max Fried (1-0, 8.74 ERA) starts Wednesday in the series finale opposite RHP J.P. France (0-2, 8.22).

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