JOHN GRANATO

So many things are not my job

So many things are not my job
A lot of things are not people's jobs. Joe Robbins/Getty Images

In the wake of Bill O’Brien’s now famous utterance of “It’s not my job” (and make no mistake about it, this will never leave him, it will always be part of his resume, quite possibly the first thing we think of when we refer to him) I’ve put together a list of jobs people don’t have.

Serena Williams: It’s not my job to not totally lose my mind and create a non-gender issue into one

Baltimore Orioles: It’s not my job to not suck as badly as any team ever.

Nathan Peterman: It’s not my job to be able to play well to last more than a half in a football game

Cleveland Browns: It’s not our job to win the turnover battle by 5 and win the football game.

Cam Newton: It’s not my job to listen to females talkin’ ‘bout routes

Matt Ryan: It’s not my job to throw a touchdown pass to Julio Jones

Jamie Lannister: It’s not my job to not smash my sister

Urban Meyer: It’s not my job to be a decent human being

Nick Saban: (See Urban Meyer)

Ed Orgeron: It’s not my job to speak English

Tom Herman: It’s not my job to beat mediocre programs like Maryland

Alex Bregman: It’s not my job to make an out

Raheel Ramzanali: It’s not my job to dress like a heterosexual male

Del Olaleye: It’s not my job to like people

Joel Blank: It’s not my job to like AJ Hoffman

AJ Hoffman: It’s not my job to keep any thought I have about anyone to myself

John Granato: It’s not my job to stay sober

 

Most Popular

SportsMap Emails
Are Awesome

Listen Live

ESPN Houston 97.5 FM
The White Sox beat the Astros, 4-2. Photo by Alex Slitz/Getty Images.

Luis Robert Jr. homered, Shane Smith pitched six effective innings and the Chicago White Sox beat the Houston Astros 4-2 on Tuesday night.

Edgar Quero had two RBIs as last-place Chicago won for the fourth time in five games.

Robert hit a run-scoring double in the second and his sixth homer in the fourth, a solo drive to left-center off Lance McCullers Jr. (1-2). He also made a sliding catch on Jake Meyers' liner to center in the eighth, stranding runners on the corners.

Smith (3-3) allowed one run and seven hits in his second straight win.

Grant Taylor, one of Chicago's top prospects, worked a 1-2-3 seventh in his major league debut. He hit 101.5 mph on his first pitch, a ball to Victor Caratini.

Brandon Eisert handled the ninth for his second save.

Isaac Paredes and Yainer Diaz each hit a sacrifice fly for Houston in the opener of a six-game homestand. McCullers permitted four runs and four hits in five innings.

Chicago scored two runs in the third to open a 3-0 lead. With two out and the bases loaded, Quero hit a two-run single to left.

Key moment

Meyers and Caratini hit back-to-back singles in the fourth, but Shane Smith got Cam Smith to ground into an inning-ending double play.

Key stat

Smith has won back-to-back starts for the first time in his career. The 25-year-old right-hander went into the game leading all MLB rookies with a 2.45 ERA.

Up next

Sean Burke (3-6, 4.03 ERA) is expected to pitch Wednesday for the White Sox against Ryan Gusto (3-3, 4.78 ERA) in the second of a three-game series.

SportsMap Emails
Are Awesome