We've seen this episode of the Super Bowl before - Here's what else TV has to offer on Super Bowl Sunday
Raise your hand if this Super Bowl (can I say that here? Or do I have to say “Big Game?”) match up just doesn’t do it for you. Mine is up, actually both hands are – are yours? My guess is that they are.
People love to say that millennials are killing everything. Well as a millennial I can tell you that the Patriots are killing the Super Bowl. Last year the Patriots presence killed my interest in the game from a football perspective, but I watched because I wanted to see our city shine. This year, though, there is nothing to connect me to the game. Usually I am down to watch football no matter who is playing, but the Patriots just suck the fun out of it. Watching a Super Bowl with the Patriots is like watching a show in syndication. While I would love to be wrong, I am confident I already know the storyline. It's the same one that has been repeated in 71% of the Super Bowls the Patriots have played in with Brady and Belichick, and in 100% of the ones where the Patriots play anyone other than the New York Giants. In case you forgot it goes something like this:
Patriots get down early
Patriots gradually climb back in the game
Clock gets late in the game, opponent is still leading, you think “The Patriots might actually lose.”
Opponent makes bone-headed move
Patriots make incredible play
Patriots score go-ahead points with 2 minutes or less remaining
You feel like an idiot for actually thinking the other team might win
I can’t be the only one who has grown tired of this script right? I mean if I want to watch something where I know the evil empire is going to score a victory I may as well just watch The Empire Strikes Back for the 387th time. At least there are lightsabers and lasers in that. So with my interest being at an all time low, I began to wonder what else I could watch during the Super Bowl. Can the rest of TV provide anything more compelling? Here is what else is on during the Super Bowl:
NCIS, NCIS New Orleans, NCIS Los Angeles (CBS) – It’s an around the country NCIS marathon. I really know nothing about this show, but know it has been on forever and has spinoffs in pretty much every city. I am pretty sure it is based on some government law-enforcement agency, but I have never heard of the NCIS outside of this show. Why is that? Regardless, I’m sure even NCIS Salt Lake City is more interesting than the Super Bowl will be.
The Simpsons (Fox) – Usually a solid 30 minutes of entertainment. I admittedly have not watched in years, but when I did the writers always seemed to keep it fresh - something the AFC has been incapable of.
Animals With Cameras (PBS) – Just the title alone is enough to capture my interest. How do these animals acquire the cameras? Is this the beginning of the primate uprising?
Puppy Bowl XI (Animal Planet) – Always a solid choice during the Super Bowl. I bet this gets much better ratings than you’d think. I smell an Animals With Cameras cross-over episode opportunity.
The Real Housewives of Atlanta (Bravo) – You want drama, you want un-predictable, you want aggression, and you want rich people whining? Forget the NFL – this is your show.
Death Row Stories marathon (CNN) – Another show whose title draws you in. Probably not as fun as Animals with Cameras but I bet it sucks you in nonetheless.
Chappelle’s Show marathon (Comedy Central) – Of all the counter Super Bowl programming this may be the winner. I could watch this over the Super Bowl without a twinge of regret.
30 for 30 (ESPN) – “The U” episode. This was one of my favorite 30 for 30s, plus the promo song they ran with it was stuck in my head for months. I bet no less than five times you say “Oh yeah, I forgot he went to Miami.” I may actually DVR this to watch it again.
Jersey Shore marathon (MTV) – If Gronk isn’t playing you can always watch this to get your Gronk fix.
Air Disasters (Smithsonian) – If you never plan to fly again you may think about checking this out.
Law and Order SVU marathon (USA) – Always a go-to when there is nothing else on. Law and Order is one of those few shows that you can watch for days on end even if you have seen every episode four times. Since it does not appear there will be a new episode of the Super Bowl until Tom Brady retires you should probably just make Law and Order your rerun of choice on Super Bowl Sunday.
*Who am I kidding - I’ll probably watch, if for no other reason than it gives me an excuse to eat all the delicious crap people serve on Super Bowl Sunday.